I wonder sometimes how in the world I keep from spinning off my feet. It seems that I am always running and always tired. I go and go until I crash to a stand still. I feel like I have been standing still more than going lately. I used up all my go it seems. I suppose moderation is the best thing to practice but my moderator is broken.
My husband is a rare sort of person who actually drives UNDER the speed limit. Yes, under. It is so unnerving! I am a petal to the metal type of gal. If you gotta get somewhere- go quickly! And yet the more I rush the more I feel I am missing.
Sometimes, I want to cancel everything. I want to go back to watching clouds pass in the sky and listening to the birds chirp. I want to watch my kids as they grow. To take them on adventures and take SO MANY PICTURES! I want to sneak away with my husband and remember the first years we shared. Before things became complicated and full of tasks to be completed.
Occasionally, I wish we could go back to the quieter times. When rocking a baby was my afternoon chore. When we had one rust bucket car that always idled high and had to be started with a screw driver but ran perfectly every time. When it was enough to just be and not always fly about to “get it all done”. That’s a laugh, it will never all be done here.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m very thankful for what we have and for all that God has blessed us with. We really have a dream come true in the flesh. It’s just that sometimes more is simply more. What matters is not what we have but who we share it with. If you see me running around looking like a scare crow – please just push me into a chair and make me have a cup of coffee with you. I think I need some lessons on moderation.