So yesterday I had prepared a post with some fun little crafts in it and today it seems to have disappeared. That has been happening a lot lately. I think I’ve got maybe 3/4 of my life kinda going in the right direction and then….whoops! I’m not talking about forgetting appointments or misplacing important items. (although I do that pretty much on a daily basis too) I mean the way we actually LIVE. Like the condition of our spirit and how we respond to life’s ups and downs and…how we deal with changes we need to make within ourselves. Ok, so I mean me. But while you are here reading this I am sure you can relate.
Normally I am a pretty content person. I really don’t need much. We live on a small income and we do a lot for ourselves rather than hire it out. We typically have too much month at the end of the money but we always have the things we need. Miraculously, we have never NEVER been without.
My husband was out of work for the better part of the year when my third child was born. He traveled to any training that the National Guard had going on. They pay for training and they used to pay food and lodging as well. He spent time working all over the states and even got to travel to Korea. That one was actually pretty cool. Even though I really hate being a single parent for weeks and months at a time we were taken care of.
We had a mystery gasser…no, not the kind you are thinking of. We had been in the middle of the coldest part of winter. Our propane was running low and we had no money to fill it. It was nearing Christmas and I was huge with my February baby. Out of nowhere the propane delivery guy has pulled up and is filling our tank. My husband tried to direct him to the neighbor’s thinking they had the wrong house number. But, to our surprise it was 100% paid for by a mysterious benefactor. Thank you, whoever you are.
To say that we are well off is untrue but to say that we have not been well taken care of is also untrue. We have had a series of bad events it seems but in the midst I am trying to remind myself of the good and the blessings we have already received.
The hubs and I are going to NC next week. It will be nice to hang out in warmer temps and have time without the kids. The reason we are going isn’t all that fun though. My father in law is dying. He is a very sick man. This may be our last visit with him. We had tried to help out with his care as much as we could but the distance across the country was just too great. My heart breaks but I know my husband needs me now.
Sometimes nothing really can help or fix a situation. I find myself weeping at odd moments and wondering what people must think of me. Truth is, I don’t care anymore. I will do what I need to do to stay strong. Sometimes our strength only comes when we are broken.
I leave you with this song. Why Not Trust God Again by Kurt Carr. It has never failed to speak to the situation at hand and fill me with hope to keep moving forward trusting in the knowledge that God is already handling my tomorrows.
p.s. I’m still figuring our links so don’t shoot me if it doesn’t work, thanks 😉